5 Things To Remember When Breastfeeding Is Hard
I can't believe I've been in this motherhood "hood" for six months!
SIX. MONTHS.
Where has the time gone?! I remember just yesterday Eli was born and latching on to nurse for the first time. My face in the picture below explains it all.
Ya'll, breastfeeding is no joke. I remember experienced moms telling me that breastfeeding could be painful, but I was so not prepared for the journey I was about to take. I wasn't really concerned about the pain the first day, as I figured my breasts just needed to get used to nursing. But by the time it was time for us to leave the hospital, I had already had multiple visitations from the hospital's lactation consultant, and was fear-mongered by a nurse into giving my baby boy half an ounce of formula. Needless to say, I was frustrated and feeling like a failure.
About a week and cracked and bleeding nipples later, I figured out Eli most likely had a lip and tongue tie. Both causes a baby to not latch on to the mother's nipple correctly, and usually results in pain for the mother. And the word pain is an understatement. I spent many of those early weeks dreading feeding time. I'd wince and brace myself for the pain whenever I had to bring Eli to my breast. Many days (sometimes multiple times a day) I would nurse and sob at the same time. The advice to unlatch the baby every time he latched on incorrectly and then try to latch him on correctly made both Eli and I cry in frustration.
When Eli got his tongue and lip ties clipped, I thought I would for sure see immediate improvement. Nope. He still had to learn how to use his tongue correctly, AND I was to massage and reopen his wound every few hours so that his ties wouldn't reattached. You can be sure there were more tears than you can count for this baby boy and mama. I was at my wit's end. I made an appointment with a lactation consultant a sweet sister from church recommended. THANK YOU, SHANNON! AND THANK YOU, LINDSAY for recommending Pea Pod to Shannon.
We visited Pea Pod every other week until Eli was a little over eight weeks old. There were major improvements and victories, and some setbacks. There were times I just couldn't do it, and would pump and give Eli a bottle. That brought about nipple confusion for a few days. There were a few instances I cracked and supplemented with formula. That brought on the discovery of Eli having a milk protein sensitivity. But then there were moments when it wouldn't hurt when Eli would latch on. Slowly, but surely, I had more and more successful, painless nursing sessions and breastfeeding began to be enjoyable.
Nowadays, I wholeheartedly love breastfeeding Eli.
Had you told me six months ago that I would come to love breastfeeding my baby boy, I’d do one of those psychotic, sleep deprived laugh-cry numbers. It’s been a long road, and I’ve almost thrown in the towel so many times, but thank goodness for a support system reminding me to take it day by day.
Speaking of support, I'd like to leave you new mamas (or mamas breastfeeding for the first time) five things to remember on this journey:
Breastfeeding isn't easy.
Sure, it's natural, but that doesn't make it easy. If it was, there wouldn't be a need for lactation consultants. Both you and your baby are new to this and need time to practice and get it right.
Use (or get) your support system.
I would have 100% given up if it wasn't for Toby, my mom and the lactation consultants. I'm even in a Facebook group for support, even though Eli and I have found a groove. Don't be afraid to ask for help and build the support you need. It truly takes a village.
You are not a failure.
Let me say it again: YOU are NOT a failure. Period. You are a great mama who is doing her best. Your child still loves you and thinks you are the greatest human being on this planet.
Fed is best.
Seriously. Whether it's with your breasts, a bottle, or formula. You feed your baby. As long as baby is being fed, healthy, and gaining weight, you're doing the best thing for your baby, mama. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
It does get easier.
If you decide to stick it out (and get help where help when needed), they say: "the first three weeks of breastfeeding are the hardest. After six weeks it starts getting easier. By three months you feel sorry for moms who have to make formula."
Breastfeeding is a beautiful thing and I am so grateful the Lord saw to it to give mamas and babies such a precious bond. It’s one I surely don’t take for granted. Here’s to six months of breastfeeding and to hopefully at least six more!